It was a slow burn to prep us for what will likely be an epic season finale.
From Grey’s Anatomy Season 19 Episode 18, we got a tragic death, Lucas telling Simone how he felt in panty-dropping fashion, Winston and Nick Boston-bound to win awards and face the sisters, and Helm’s official return.
For an hour that squeezed so much stuff in, it doesn’t feel as if much happened.
It was lovely to see that two of the latest additions to the attending team, Winston and Nick, are both receiving recognition for their work with the Catherine Fox Awards.
And it was fun that the hour spent a good time making fun of itself over how seemingly random that decision is when we’ve witnessed some of Grey’s finest pull off some award-worthy medical wins without the same type of fanfare.
Owen and Amelia’s bitterness over their lack of recognition were amusing, especially when Amelia mentioned that she was also part of the same medical study and work that got Mer’s recognition.
And Bailey getting on their case only to run down the long line of noteworthy things she’s done was funny.
The wins were bittersweet for both Nick and Winston. For Winston, his recognition still had him in Maggie’s shadow. He probably felt he was tacked on as an afterthought when the person they’re really acknowledging is Maggie.
And the thought of going to Boston to accept this award and likely having to share the stage with his estranged wife is probably not high up on the list of things he’d love to do.
However, he came for the practical point of acknowledging how few men of color have received that honor. He knows this accomplishment is bigger than him, and he’d show up because he represents all the men of color who can come after him.
Interestingly, Nick didn’t think of how he could be in a similar position until his talk with Lucas later in the installment. Nick isn’t the flashy type who puts a stake in award recognition and things of that nature.
And he certainly didn’t have any interest in facing Meredith in Boston after she blew him off and broke his heart.
But it was cool to see Nick have this late realization that in a world of identity and representation, he does, in fact, represent something important to people, too.
He probably never put much stock in it before as both a white person and a male. But it took Lucas opening up to him about ADHD, his own experiences as he’s been processing this self-diagnosis and reevaluating his entire life until his point, and more for Nick to see why his winning matters.
Even if he doesn’t put a stake in those things and they don’t matter to him, they do matter to Lucas, the interns he’s mentoring, and people like them with ADHD in a challenging field.
I appreciated that Nick allowed that to sink in, why Lucas needed Nick to win and accept that award, and how he inspires him. Nick didn’t set out to be a mentor in that sense, but he’s the type who sees his responsibility in a situation like this.
He’s not doing this for himself, but he’s doing it for Lucas and others like him, the future. I love how quietly honorable Nick is in that way, and he remains one of the best mentors for this class and this new age.
His scene with Lucas was emotional for a plethora of reasons.
It was upsetting when Lucas had to make that call to Ray’s mother. It never gets easier telling the relative of a loved one that they passed away, and Ray’s death felt so senseless.
By the end, it seems he was right about his premonition, and he’d never make it to see his 30th birthday despite his best efforts.
Lucas pulled off a minor miracle by getting Ray to agree to the surgery after he kept putting it off. Had Ray walked out of the doors, his aorta would’ve ruptured, and they wouldn’t have even had a fraction of a chance at saving him right away.
The surgery scene was beautifully shot, and some excellent camera work was there, which only heightened the nerve-wracking experience and intensity.
Teddy and Lucas were so gutted when Teddy called it that you wanted to reach through the screen and hug them both.
And it’s one of those cases that leaves its hooks in a person and prompts Lucas to focus on his own life in many ways.
His outburst about his parents and family not realizing he had ADHD was so on point and real. He can’t make heads or tails over how a family of doctors couldn’t see all the signs, and he had to struggle his entire life.
His resentment is strong as he has concluded that maybe they were too busy seeing him as a lazy screwup that they didn’t bother to consider anything else. And Nick’s point about them being high-achievers and thus having a blind spot sort of flows into that as well.
Things must’ve come easier to them, so they couldn’t fathom that they didn’t work for Lucas. With this storyline alone it’s opening the door for Lucas’ parents to come into play, and it’s setting things up nicely for the reveal of which Shepherd’s sister is his mother.
I cannot wait to see this explored more.
But in the meantime, as he understands his ADHD — as much as I love this storyline for him, I still need him to get the official diagnosis– he’s already making sense of how it affects him daily.
I loved that he approached Simone, told her how it works and what it causes him to do, and then laid out his feelings for her and his request that she not marry that jerk, Trey.
Simone’s restraint is damn near surreal because there is no way on earth this gorgeous, beautifully spirited, funny, kind, sweet boy who is 1000% head over heels could admit his feelings like that and lay it all out there, and I wouldn’t fold like a card table at a BBQ.
How can Simone hear everything that Lucas says to her, how the few things he’s ever confident about are his feelings for her and how much he knows her and feels that they are each other’s person, and not jump his bones?
Can one’s clothes disintegrate off of their body from such words and sentiments?
Lucas has tried to be Simone’s friend, her Man of Honor, a respectful, honorable man who respects her wishes to his own detriment, but now he’s put the gauntlet down, dammit.
He wants her, and he put the ball entirely in her court so there’s no confusion. And he’s right in everything he says about Trey.
Lucas has the Shepherd charm, and while they’re pulling from Japril with this, let us hope Simone doesn’t make it down that aisle.
At this rate, it feels like she’s getting married to her grandmother as she chases the moments of lucidity with her than it is because of her love for Trey.
Lucas gets all the kudos for having the cajones to tell Simone how he feels. Link, on the other hand, failed at doing so, and now he’s a jealous mess.
It doesn’t look cute on him, either. Sam hasn’t hesitated when making his feelings known about Jo. Frankly, it started off charming and veered into offputting because of his persistence.
But it got him his desired results. The love triangle scenes felt like they took up too much of the installment and dragged things out.
Link, my darling, needs to grow a pair and be honest with Jo or stop getting mad that Sam has charmed her.
Blue is trying to navigate Jules as best as he can, given that she’s not giving him much to work with or any room.
Jules is terrified of losing Maxine, and it shows. She tried to be professional and detached enough to work on Maxine’s case but couldn’t.
Bailey was right to kick her off the case.
The fascinating thing about Jules is her unwillingness to realize what’s right in front of her. Only when this happened had she considered that Maxine had become her family.
She’s so protective of her heart and guarded, but she fails to see how people slip into it anyway.
Maxine is smart enough to recognize already that Jules represents what Maxine didn’t have with her son. She has a daughter to date — she’s more than a roommate, and it’s evident when she gave Jules all the information she needs if anything happens to her.
It’s Jules that she trusts with these things.
And Blue has gotten under her skin too, and she’s scared of facing what that means. Jules is terrified of loving people or being loved.
It was heartbreaking when she was sobbing in the on-call room alone despite Blue’s sweet gestures. I will not be emotionally okay if they rip Maxine away from Jules.
Mika had a deserved moment to tell Helm how annoyed she was that Helm went behind her back and spoke to Teddy.
But it’s good to know that their ship is making some progress. Mika worked up the nerve to ask Helm out, and she got a date, even if it’ll be a one-time thing for now because Helm is returning to GSM.
It’ll be great to have her back, and she negotiated a great deal for herself as a co-chief resident with an increase in paid leave.
If only Levi had advocated for himself the way Helm has managed to do for herself and others.
Over to you, Grey’s Fanatics.
What are your favorite ships at the moment, and who are you rooting for most? Were you upset over Ray’s death? Are you excited Helm is back? Sound off below!
You can watch Grey’s Anatomy online here via TV Fanatic.
Jasmine Blu is a senior staff writer for TV Fanatic. She is an insomniac who spends late nights and early mornings binge-watching way too many shows and binge-drinking way too much tea. Her eclectic taste makes her an unpredictable viewer with an appreciation for complex characters, diverse representation, dynamic duos, compelling stories, and guilty pleasures. You’ll definitely find her obsessively live-tweeting, waxing poetic, and chatting up fellow Fanatics and readers. Follow her on Twitter.